Here I go again D:

I feel like, ever since I moved home that is, that I've become a more,
oh,
solitary person.
And I think I've gotten a little meaner too D:
My patience runs out quicker.
I'm not as happy.

I don't know.

I pray this is just a phase I'll get over eventually.

...Where to begin.

First things first.

I want to apologize.

I want to apologize for falling off the face of the planet and becoming a lost artifact.

I'm sorry for not taking the initiative to say hello.
I have an incredibly hard time doing that. Really, I do.
I don't know why.
I'm a very, very, very unsociable person.
I'm not outgoing.
If it seems I am it's a mask I'm wearing.

So I'm sorry.
I blame myself for completely shutting off all contact.
Why?
I don't know.
If I want to talk I always wait to have something to talk about.
As of late.

I have nothing to talk about.
Nothing.
Zilch.
Nada.

So I'm sorry I haven't texted you to say hi, how's it going.
I'm sorry I haven't read your blogs.
Or emailed you.
Or facebooked you.

And it's not just you, it's every living, breathing person I've ever come into contact with.

And again I say I'm sorry.

But.

I don't want to stab you in the heart.

But,

I'm happy.

Sort of.

9:00 am

At this time, I had finished filling out all my paper work and was on my way back to my room. I swiped my ID card into the reader to get back into the dorm and it blinked red at me. I tried again. Still red. Thankfully a friend was heading out and was able to let me in.

At this time, I was no longer a student at ACU.

Will I miss it? Yes. Terribly. The environment is something like a second home. It's friendly, welcoming, small and cozy, and my greatest friends are there.

But life says I need a degree to be successful. If I'm going to get a degree, I want it to be in something I enjoy.

At ACU I was a 2D major. Meaning, everything not having to do with digital art.

Digital art is my forte.

For this semester I am going to go to Richland Community college and get my core classes done, and maybe take a painting class so I'll be listed as a full time student.

In the fall I will hopefully go to UNT and graduate with a degree in animation. Unless another college catches my fancy.

Am I scared? Yes. When I came to ACU I had an older sister to show me around. At Richland, I won't.

I'll be on my own.

It's 10:00 am.

...Wanna know how bad I don't want to be here?

To the point where I'm shaking in misery.

Literally. I feel like a chihuahua right now.

My stomach hurts.

I feel depressed.

I don't want to be here.

Yes I'm glad to see the people.

....

AGH.

OH. MY GOODNESS.

For the longest time I actually FORGOT that I had a blog!

and you know what!

My animation has been done since CHRISTMAS!

Oh dear oh dear I'm sorry!

But here here here watch it 8D

Click here!

Home For the Holidays

What a creative title, right? Well, currently, I'm sitting in the New Orleans airport waiting for a 3:45 flight back to Dallas. It's been torture, actually. Last night we (the fam + gram and grandpa) had Chinese food for dinner. Apparently it didn't really agree with my stomach and I upchucked at 11:30 ish last night and my stomach still isn't happy with me. All I've had to eat today is 100 calorie snack things, cinnamon toast crunch, a rice crispie treat and a small thing of yogurt. So in other words, no real mealage. Nothing sounds good, not even my favorite food. Argh. So I have 2 more hours to do nothing and browse along on my 'pooter.

I kinda didn't want to leave Connecticut this morning. It had just snowed Sunday night and it was a great surprise Monday morning waking up to mid-shin deep snow, but mom and dad both have to go back to work so alas, back to Texas we go. I must say though, I am excited to get back to Texas, mainly because that's where Christmas is and that's where my new tablet is! I'm getting a wacom intuos4 tablet. I hope. We ordered it from Amazon. I can't wait to put it to good use.

Okay, and now, I love Christmas music, don't get me wrong, but the music they have playing is awful and annoying.

So I'm going to plug in my headphones and suffer through a headache and tummy aches.

Merry Christmas!

Dadgummit

Could today get any worse...